TR EMERITUS

I’ll be the first to admit that I am often quite critical of “my people.” As a rule of thumb, I don’t have much sympathy for the local, middle-class graduate Chinese, whom often comes across as self-entitled. You’re talking about a group that constantly complains about how “Indian” nationals are “stealing” jobs in the professional sector that they believe a degree entitles them to, yet they would have no hesitation in spitting on the maids who clean their homes or the construction workers who build them.

We’re the group of people who complain that the “foreigners,” are “helping each other,” because to us that’s not normal – screwing our own is. The worst offenders are the young professional class. I think of the time that I was upset that Singapore takes violence seriously because I really wanted to go up to a young PMET in Asia-Square and headbutt him in the nose until he went blind. This excuse of a human being thought it was fun to squish some sweets that the cleaning lady wanted to take home for her grandkids. The only thing that happened to him was his equally pathetic girlfriend told him off and he looked a little sheepish. She should have broken a bottle across his skull thus freeing herself from the possible crime of producing excuses of humans as children.

Because I take this stance, I don’t make myself popular in some parts of cyberspace. I get accused of being “pro-Indian” and “anti-Chinese” and if there’s nothing to have a go at me for, they go at me for marrying Vietnamese. Apparently, I am moving Singapore manhood downwards. Not sure how they figured that one out – at least the Vietnamese take care of their elderly and vulnerable whilst we screw over our old folks so that we can give whatever we have to people from “advanced” countries earning double what we do.

Having said what I just said, I recently experienced something that proves what I’ve said to be wrong. I discovered Singaporeans who are willing to go out of their way to help their own. I am speaking as someone who is beneficiary of such kindness.

It started with the return of gout. Had an attack in my left knee, which started on a Saturday night and got worse on a Sunday. By early morning, the pain was so bad that I have problems putting on my trousers. It was clear that I needed medical attention and so I thought I would make my way to the polyclinic.

The first person who showed me kindness was the Grab (Southeast Asia’s answer to Uber). The man went out of his way to create space in the car so that I could get in and out with minimal pain. When he reached the polyclinic, he tried to get me as close as possible to the door so I would minimize the need to move the leg that was in pain.

The pain was bad and I had to just deal with it. To say that sitting in a wheelchair was uncomfortable was an understatement.

The second act of kindness came when I took another Grab ride back my aunt’s home, where I could rest. This Grab driver saw that I was having trouble walking and when I got to my aunt’s, he parked his car and helped me hobble up the unit (my aunty lives on the 22nd floor). This was something he didn’t need to do but he took it upon himself to help me past the moment when I had ceased to be his customer.

So, it’s a relief for me to experience kindness from “my people” when I needed it. It made me feel a bit more optimistic about being Singaporean and Chinese. I mean, these guys were earning less than $20 from me and yet they still went out of their way to help me after their contractual obligation to me ran out. When you experience this type of thing, you get the sense that not all of us are “a***holes” and you start to think that if you have enough guys like this, it is possible to make a more decent society.

Tang Li

*Although I’ve been based mainly in Singapore for nearly two decades, I’ve had the privilege of being able to meet people who have crossed borders and cultures. I’ve befriended ministers and ambassadors and worked on projects involving a former head of state. Yet, at the same time, I’ve had the privilege of befriending migrant labourers and former convicts. All of them have a story to tell. All of them add to the fabric of life. I hope to express the stories that inspire us to create life as it should be.

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